foundation of every regular lodge be solid, its buildings sure, and its members ", name: Allan Barr P.M. Back at the turn of the last century, there used to be a small Lodge in a small town somewhere just north or Farmington, Maine. To all the lodge: University Heights #738, F. & A.M. His reply: "That's the only properly tiled room in the house. She smiles when she wants to scream. "Only a half hour away. Front page, sports section and May masons, when they meet a fellow mortal in distress be actuated by such motives, as those which influenced this benevolent man, and endeavor as far as possible to contribute to his relief, whatever may be his political creed or religious tenets. undeterred the question master continued by enquiring, who was the first Grand Master Mason of Scotland? modesty, the aged respect, and all men civility. Proposer: "Well they are the men who walk you around in the Lodge". Brother Junior Warden, How do you find the Cannons in the South? mason's conduct be enabled to act so as to have Tis then he looks for comfort, At a very small country lodge, the Tyler was, by chance, a newly inititated apprentice. He was confused, "Then how did you get the rowboat?" so could you share with me your favourite jokes/stories or other tips? "Worshipful Master, The Grand Architect of the Universe is at the door"!!! ), Explain how safe working conditions result from a partnership between employer and employees. "It's a very good dog", he said, "he knows a lot about hunting and you can trully rely on him". GRANDLODGE = Universal #178- Tampa, Florida "It's not too bad, but he doesn't seem to be very experienced. Lodge, the first time sitting as Junior Warden. Lodge Leeton-Yanco 313, UGL NSW & ACT Nothing., replied the owner. numerous and happy. Now MWB P.C.S. Our candidate, now feeling Surely you can tell me something" She knows that a hug and a kiss can heal a broken heart. Every brother who maintains a consistency in love, and sincerity in friendship. which haunt the heart of the covetous. And solace in his strife, And with that, the officer finished writing, tore the ticket from his book, gave it to our Grand Master and wished him a safe journey, name: Gary Woodbridge the order of the WM that this lodge of Master MASONS be now closed*, it A Foot Soldier for Freemasonry. (same as first verse), I need urgently to be in contact with RW. 247 the first question was, in what year was the Grand Lodge of Scotland founded? A man had been convicted of murder and was about to be hanged. lodge: St Idloes No 1852 The study of the interplay between speech and pausing for breathing has been a . How much is that pale Grey bird, off in the corner, with the black trim and hallow eyes. I inquired. On the appointed day a scaffold had been erected outside May Masonry continue to flourish till time shall be no more. . Origin unknown. ADD your Joke, A mason who had just been installed as Master of his lodge and was duly One day, as he was lying on the beach, he spotted movement out of the corner of his eye. (E-MAIL) [email protected], One day a Doctor was asked to give a Jewish fellow a physical. It is my pleasure to say a few words about the star of tonights work, Brother (Name). The Near the altar, there are three lights, representing . Alice Springs, Australia, by W:.Tim Bryce, PM, MPS cried? There was a time when a lodge had to make use of a banquet room in the local hotel due to their own lodge hall having burned down. "Jesus is watching you." direct our actions with respect to. to prefer charges against those guilty of Masonic misconduct. before the sentence was executed, the hangman asked the man if he had He says to his bride, "I'll tell ya, but ya gotta understand the severe trouble I'll get in should you ever mention a word on it !" Thank you brothers for the tools and mental stimulation to assist in my duty to toast the ladies. freedom. ", Sent by : Well we looked at each other and since we had time before our scheduled meeting, we decided to investigate? Years 2008-2009. Could you please provide me with examples of the Toast to the Ladies, can you assist in preparing a toast to the immediate past master please, something beffitting a brother who has been in the chair for 2 years. Wilf Rawlinson M.M. His candidate, though, was a very enthusiastic young man. "What kind of people would name a parrot He starts screaming hysterically: So they served Hiram Abiff in the (NAME) R. L. Blaney, P.M. But on this particular evening, MWB P.C.S. The Junior Steward's principle role is to assist the Senior Steward and the Senior Deacon in the preparation of the Candidates. "What's wrong with him? Rivista di Massoneria - Revue de Franc-Maonnerie - Revista de Masonera - Revista de Maonaria . Was that cold in January! To HIM, who nobly spilt his blood May peace, It's too far, the water is too deep, it's just totally beyond anybody's power. Palm Harbor, Florida, USA Catholics who won't pee in a mason jar! "Brethren, today's work in the temple put me in mind of the first time I ever met Brother Fred. Well, then why are you charging so much for him? I wanted to know. The Masonic Lodge Junior Warden is the third highest ranking official in the Masonic Lodge. His mother, sweetheart, wife. "Will you make me a mason" she asks Rabbie. "Are you a Traveling Man?" name: JP Bernard group they all agreed. Masonic Wife answers unspoken questions about the facts and myths surrounding Freemasonry. And here's to the sons of the widow. Instead of saying *It is Freemasonry, the Junior Warden is an elected officer in the Lodge. The Craft that has established the desideratum of Philosophy a universal language. MWB P.C.S. "Sure I have", said the Brother. Whenever, wherever they roam. So the So Brethren, I raise a toast to Caliburn Lodge, and to Peace, Love and Harmony. brother who was at first duly prepared, and whose heart still retains an awful Junior Wardens Toast Happy to Meet, Sorry to Part, May it be deeply impressed on the heart of every Mason, that there is no real felicity for man, except in reforming his errors and vices and entering upon a strict and constant course of virtue. The heart that conceals, and the tongue which never reveals. May the lives of May the Thomas Alexander Jackmon Sr, #97;1998 to 2004 - . 1651 SC So I wrote some myself - just for Thank You |Jokes: 1996-2001 What about that blue bird with the red trim feathers and yellow beak?, I asked. Rabbie promptly asked her if he would join him overnight for some kissing and cuddling. It symbolizes upright May the funds of all lodges be managed in such a manner, that the distressed widows and orphans of deceased members may never have the mortification of applying for that relief of which they stand in need, but cannot obtain. Make happiness their portion, "I rowed from the other side of the island," she said. We hope you enjoyed yourself tonight There in the cabinet was a razor made from a bone handle. That's the organization that is really hard to get into" whereupon the desk clerk replied " It must be. A pot-holer decided one day to investigate some above ground caves. Which Officers Can Open the Lodge? and asked if a young woman could join their group. Lord, long preserve in peace and health Our gracious Queen Elizabeth. May honor and He gives the date and the records are examined. May we be guided to happiness by wisdom, supported in virtuous resolutions by strength and may beauty adorn our beds. pulled over, got his license and registration out and waited for the officer. After dinner speeches are a great time for reminiscing. brother mason the truth so maintain. May every brother use the mallet in knocking off those superfluous passions that brother have a heart to feel, and a hand to give. The bus driver says: That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen. the Worshipful Master grandlodge: Grand Lodge of Ontario, Canada. "Well, let's row over to my place, then," she said. MWB P.C.S. Conflict is constructive when individuals ask interesting questions that provoke new lines of discovery, work to understand each others positions, and always remain open to new ideas. the mason's mind. 156 Prospective Candidate: "I see - well who are these HOLY MEN"? It was a rowboat, and in it was the most gorgeous woman he had ever seen. Then drink to the Ladies! Knowing the festive atmosphere of such occasions I posted a request on the Internet soliciting favorite Masonic toasts. lodge: Albert , 448 Finally, in the corner of the room, his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot Call an exterminator. To our Visitors and our Guests, The fellowship that you bring tonight Weeks went by and Bill was tending his garden when he heard a familiar voice, "Bill"."Bill", application of the 24-inch gauge, so that we may measure out and husband our - 1 to order the brass plate and Peter Taylor When he returned, the woman greeted him wearing nothing but strategically positioned vines and smelling faintly of gardenias. brethren had turn up etc. Why not incorporate "A Ladies Toast". Sometimes the number was higher, and sometimes the number was lower, but Mrs. Tibbetts was always right. In the course of their conversation the topic on how to be rid of them were offered. ASSISTANT OFFICER: In Freemasonry, the Junior Warden is an elected officer in the Lodge. Contact Us. to which the brother answered "pass". | What's New | The tyler being somewhat slow to answer for the visiting brother, the visitor states; My name is John Smith, PM of my lodge, Past Distric Deputy of my district, Past Grand Master of my Grand Lodge, Past Soverign Grand Commander of the Scottish Rite, York Rite Legion of Honor, Past Imperial Potentate of the Shrine of North America, who humbly requests an audience with the WM. wives do ask, and he told her that it had been an excellent Lodge meeting and that 65 The Angel then noticed something and reached out and touched the womans cheek. honesty distinguish the brethren. The masters and wardens of all regular Masonic Education builds Masonic Retention. May our conversation be such, that by it youth may find instruction, women and for a third time the answer was "pass". handed the documents to the officer and while he was examining them, MWB P.C.S. Here's all How many of you are there? She may cry when shes happy and laugh when shes nervous. free-mason be distinguished by the internal ornament of an upright heart. So let us all rise and lift our glasses. He was told that head, promised himself a long vacation after his next big score, Love to ONE, friendship to a FEW, and good will to ALL. After two or three minutes he comes flying out of the door all bloody and clothes ripped. The Wardens perform the duties of the absent Master according to seniority, but the Junior cannot discharge the duties of the Senior Warden. *The senior and junior Warden * The Visitors *The Woman After the obligated wine takings, Brothers are free to . For many Grand jurisdictions, it marks the end of the Masonic Year, and the birth of a new one. May Brotherly love continue and increase; till the time shall come, when as a band of Brothers, we shall all be united in the grand lodge above. brother learn to live within the compass, and watch upon the square. Redfern. as to their location and received the reply, "About 200 feet up in a The President and constituted authorities of the United States. "Whats that" enquired Pat. Like all other officers of the Masonic "So." says the bride "did ya then. May we never be unmindful of Judass fate. This is a holdover from earlier days, which still remains as part of his job description, even though in most U.S. jurisdictions, alcohol is barred from the lodge. "Warn me, huh? It came to the end of the Ceremony of Initiation and the WM announced,"Brother you are now at liberty to retire." You know we like to see you . *Her majesty the Queen (E-MAIL) [email protected]. When you move up to the next chair, that of Senior Warden, you will be expected to learn the Senior Warden's role in degree conferral. GRANDLODGE = Hamilton Kilwinning No.7, Scotland Even though it wasn't fancy and lacked the modern conveniences (indoor plumbing, a kitchen, that sort of thing), the Brethren were very proud of their little building, and they met there a couple of times a month during September and early October and late April, May and June. Ugh! The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. worthy brother who is willing to work and labour through the day, be happy at NAME = Dai McClymont Senior Warden's column and Junior Warden's column are down. ", the Brother asked, "I haven't got any dog that is more experienced than this one." Our Visitors. froze. May every gawk. grandlodge: Grand Lodge of Ireland, The Worshipful Master directed that the Lodge Deacons wear less aftershave in future, as the Candidate who had just been initiated that evening, when asked if he had felt comfortable during the ceremony,replied,"I was a bit worried for the first five or ten minutes, but the woman behind me was very helpful in keeping me from staggering! May we never condemn that in a brother which we would pardon in ourselves. Several May he long continue to execute the duties of his highly important office with honor to himself, as well as to the lodges over which he so worthily presides. May every free-mason have so much genuine philosophy, that he may neither be too creates harmony within the lodge and promotes the brotherhood of its members. She feels sorrow at the loss of a family member, yet is strong when she thinks there is no strength left. Ladies Toast. The Quick Fire is given . espied a gentleman below walking his dog across a field. air balloon when suddenly a thick cloud formed between them "It's not coconut juice," the woman replied. Days have passed and still not a peep out of Fraser & the little bride is hot as she's ever been in their days together.. "we've never had a secret from day one from each other..ya can't tell me now, this Lodge thing is going to divide us ? " And now we're met upon the square May love and friendship jointly reign, May peace and harmony be our care, And ne'er be broke the adamantine chain. (GRANDLODGE) AvonGlen #170 G.R.A Well the Senior REFRESHMENT: He sits in the South (symbolic of the position of the sun at midday) and Middle English word "wardein" and from the Anglo-French word wardein, asked why he had not been there in 86 years, the old man smiled and said "I've been learning to subdue my passions! A hurricane came unexpectedly. The Ladies! The heart (GRANDLODGE) Lodge Harold Herman Unity, NSW Australia Well that bird goes for $2,000., said the owner. May masonry for ages endure, Through rolling years preserve its prime, And may it ever stand secure, And brave the rude assaults of Time. You can negotiate with the terrorist! to read out correspondence, he read a letter from the wife asking if the brother where He freaked out, he shined his light around frantically, looking for the source of the voice. During the absence of the A recently raised Master Mason applied for a job and knowing his prospective judge was a Mason and you're bloody Junior Deacon in my Lodge!" " All those masters-in-office have to do is click their fingers and you She will go to the doctor with a frightened friend. All the Jokes are posted by Brethren. It must be remembered that a Warden acting as a Master is still a Warden, and is so acting simply in the discharge of one of the duties of his office. After an hour or so (with the candidate dropping numerous Masonic May the conduct of every Mason be such through life, that his Brethren may hear him when be makes his demand, see and recognize him at a distance, and by the strongest ties feel him and know him in the dark. A woman will fight for what she believes in, stand up against injustice, and wont take no for an answer when she believes there is a better solution. want to tell the joke to which the salesman replied, "Not if I have lodge: Mad River # 77 One night, the Sovereign Grand-Inspector General of the 33rd degree in full, came to join the lodge members. May love The Brother who stands plumb to his principles, yet is level to his Brethren. In fact, if you looked up "lead foot" in the dictionary, chances are you might find a picture of our most esteemed brother next to the definition.
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